The off season is not even 24 hours old and I want to rip someone throat out in the Mets front  office. The shit heads in charge have made their big announcement on the changes in the coaching staff.  Sandy Alomar Sr and Luis Alicea get the ax and Hojo, Razor Shines and Old School Dan Warthen  get to stay.

Sandy Sr. will be reassigned to another job in the organization most likely tending bar in the Aclea Club, Alicea will be reassigned to body and fender work across the street at Minaya’s Auto Repairs.

Hojo stays because David Wright says he stays, and Wright is the highest ranking Caucasian in the clubhouse so he gets to make a minority hire . You wouldn’t have to be an online betting specialist to know that was going to happen.

Razor Shines stays because he and Jerry are tight which makes Shines, Jerry’s Art Fowler with the cirosess of the liver of course. Thankfully Razor will be assigned to bench coach job so no more innocent base runners get injured. Look for Obie One Oberkfell named as third base traffic cop.

Old School Dan Warthen stays because he has threatened to go public with stories of Jeffey Skill Sets, Mr. Met and Charlie Samuels hooking up at the Holiday Inn on Roosevelt Ave for an erotic adventure. My sources tell me there is a picture of all three involved in a ménage au trois while wearing black Mets uniform tops and black Mets caps with blue bills. Mr Met now answers to the name “Lucky Pierre.” NFL Odds weren’t even taken on this one.

Sandy Alomar Jr and Randy Niemann are staying as well because there is no definitive proof that Sandy Alomar Jr or Randy Niemann actually exists.

So far the off season is off to a less than rousing start.

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