Here’s the Mets news of the day:

The Mets are in a pennant race but on the wrong side of the track. The red-hot Redbrids are breathing down the necks of the Bravos of whom the Mets took two out three games from last week and have made the Washington Generals Mets look like stumblebums the last two nights.

Lucas Duda came out of the game last night after running into the right field fence. Doctors say he does not show symptoms of a concussion. Duda will announce his retirement from baseball Monday at Citi Field due to effects of the head injury he suffered last night.

The Mets organization have made the decision it’s better to go to Home Depot and invest in plywood, nails and Scotts Turf Builder to rebuild the Great Wall of Flushing into the Grotto De Corona complete with a small wall, a grassy knoll and votive candles, than to go out and get better players. If this doesn’t work, the Skill Sets will petition MLB to allow David Wright to take all his home at bats at the 2K Sports Fan Fest Wiffle Ball Field.  

Pedro Beato was ineffective again last night out of the pen. Beato claims to be fatigued due to pitching for close to 20 months straight between Winter ball, Minor Leagues and this full year with the Mets. NYC Department of Child Services is looking into Beato’s claim of abuse by his foster parents, Dan Warthen and Terry Collins.

Sandy Alderson was surprised when told that the vast majority of Mets fans want the outfield walls painted BLUE. I guess he’d be shocked, SHOCKED to find out that we think the Black Jerseys suck ass as well.

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