JEFFEY AND JOHN’S EXCELLENT ADVENTURE

So it just happens that Jeffey Wilpon en route to St Lonesome to watch some of his prized farm hands with GM in training John Ricco in tow, makes a pit stop in Atlanta maybe to watch his team play but most likely to buy a pair of high class kicks, but anyway while he was in town taking in the ball game, his manager for the next month, Jerry Manuel felt this was as good as time as ever to show Jeffey Skill Sets where is daddy’s hard earn cash is going. First J-Man inserted Luis Castillo and Jeff Francoeur in the lineup, because I don’t know if you’ve heard (come closer to the screen because this info needs to be kept on the downlow) the Mets still think they are in contention for the post season shhhhhhhhhhhhhhh don’t let the rest of the NL know shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Pat Misch made every Mets fan who wondered why he wasn’t given the call up earlier the answer to that query by getting pounded harder than an British Heavyweight . But just as Jeffey Skill Sets and Executive in Training Ricco were ready to leave, Manuel sent a note to them to hang in for another inning or two as he had a really big surprise for them. So Jeffey grabbed another cotton candy and went back to his seat.

So now it’s the bottom of the seventh inning and the Mets down five runs and Jeffey on his eighth Coca-Cola is getting antsy as he’s seen enough of this listless team and all he can think about is watching Nickelodeon on the TV of the St. Lonesome Motel 6 when all of a sudden the visitor’s bullpen gate opens and on the big screen at the Ted this video appears and the crowd let’s out a collective gasp:

“One singular sensation, every little step he takes……………….

IT’S…..IT’S……OLLIE PEREZ…………………

Welllllllll Jeffey drops his Coke, Cotton Candy and his Mets Build A Bear. Ricco drops his Baseball General Managing for Dummies book and both men stare at the Mets manager as he stands on the top step of the dugout laughing his lame duck ass off.

For the first time in a month Ollie Perez takes off his Mets Snuggie to enter a game and throw live pitches. Oh and did Ollie ever throw a live pitch to Brian McCann. McCann just missed the first offering by OP, I guess he was still startled by the Resurrection but he made sure he got a hold of the next pitch and launched it over the right field wall for a home run. Ahhhhh so good to see Ollie hasn’t lost a step in his month layoff; if he’s anything, he is consistent. Of Perez’ 29 pitches 14 were K’s not bad. With only 17 home games left in this scintillating Mets season we can only hope that J-Man uses OP in a few of those games as Perez is such a fan fave we all want to express our feeling for him.           

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STICKS AND STONES MAY BREAK MY BONES BUT THE METS WILL NEVER HURT ME

My biggest problem with Omar Minaya and Jerry Manuel is neither of these two challenge any of their players publicly. I’m not saying it’s the right thing to do but desperate times call for desperate measures.   The cool, calm way is just not working and Jerry trying not to throw anyone under a bus in the press isn’t working  either, so maybe it’s time for some tough love and start calling guys out by name.  If your Manuel, you know your job is on the line and if these underachievers don’t kick it in gear soon, you’ll be out of a job and maybe that’s what Manuel wants. Maybe J-Man has had it with this team and organization that he can just play out the next month and a half get released and go home?  It could be the players are taking their cue from their skipper. That’s why Jerry Manuel has got to go. Let Dave Jauss finish out the season but a message needs to be sent this isn’t a fucking country club and no one is set for life in Flushing.

Same with Minaya, how does he stay so calm? At some point shouldn’t he address the team and read the riot act? Doesn’t it bother him that just about every Mets fan thinks he’s a shit ass GM that only knows how to throw money at free agents and sign over the hill players?  Does he enjoy being in charge of a team that is made the punch line of jokes in all of baseball?

What about the owner? Does Jeffey Skill Sets enjoy be called a douchebag by me and other fans? Doesn’t get he ever get pissed that he is portrayed as a buffoon and spoiled little rich kid that evey Mets fan wants to punch in the face?

Is there anyone associated with this organization that ever gets mad? Besides Crazy Freddie? If ownership had a quarter of the passion and fight of it’s fan base, this team wouldn’t be in the sad position it’s in now.

You know what makes it worse? The Phillies and Red Sox have been decimated by injuries but both teams are still in the think of a pennant race. You know why? Because their players have boulders for balls unlike our Mets who I hate to say it, are cowards and I can call them cowards and losers and any other name I want and any of the MSM can show this post to the players, GM, or owner and they won’t do a damn thing about it.

Hey Omar, Hey Jerry, Hey Jeff, Hey David Wright any of you guys feel froggy, then leap!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER

About last night:

So how many folks suffered a sprain or broken leg jumping back on the Johan Santana bandwagon?  I guess he’s back to being the Ace of the staff eh?

Funny I’m hearing any of the Carlos Beltran’ range is shot talk either ?

And how about Angel Pagan playing a mean right field? Let me help you with those bags Mr. Francoeur!

Even though Jerry Manuel was tossed from the game in the second inning, we still were treated to some “Jerry Ball” in the 8th inning. With the Mets up 2-1, Jose Reyes leads off with a walk off Vicente (Jimmy “Super Fly” Snuka look a like) Padillia. Reyes procedes to steal 2nd base. Luis Castillo then walks as well, so maybe the Mets are getting set for that elusive big inning we al have been waiting for. But hold on there you Earl Waever devotees, J-Man will have none of that big inning stuff, no way. From the bowels of Dodger Stadium, the Gansta’ sends word to Dave Jauss the pretend manager, to have Angel Pagan sacrifice the runners over. Pagan by the way has a .940 OPS with runners on base and an even more impressive 1.072 OPS with runners in scoring position. Some where in a retirement home in Florida, Earl Weaver lit up a Raleigh and muttered, “what a fuckin’ moron”

Not to be outdone, St Joseph of Torre decided to go reliever for batter in the inning helping the Mets and the struggling Jason Bay break the game open via Bay’s three run double. My eyes were bleeding after that inning.

Darryl Strawberry wants this current Mets team to turn back the clock and play like the 86ers. It’s a nice thought but it’ll never happen. This group is too fragile psychologically. When the going is good, they are all smiles and back slaps, but as soon as adversity rears it’s ugly head, they dive under the bed instead of meeting it head on. Part of it is the makeup of the team and part of it is the manager who plays not to lose (as we saw in last nights 8th inning) Players are too cautious especially the relievers as the slightest slip could cost you a job. The front office takes a big brunt of this as well by telling the world that the team is solvent but still won’t pay off  or trade off non productive players. A big move for this organization is to DFA Fernando Nieve and bring up Manny Acosta. Then when Nieve clears waivers, they will resign him and send him to Buffalo and bring him back up sometime in August. So predictable.  The team mirrors it’s owner, it talks a good fight but lacks the balls to back it up.

Let’s hope Big Pelf fixed whatever was broken and pitches a gem today in LA LA Land

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HANGIN’ WITH J-MAN

Yup, that’s  me and Jerry Manuel, I forgot all about this picture my wife was going over a flash card from last summer and found this I wonder if Jerry wants me to autograph this for him

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ALL THAT’S MISSING IS THE MARCHING BAND

There is nothing easy with these Mets. Johan Santana was vintage Santana last night but no Mets game is complete until we have the late inning Relievers on Parade with your Grand Marshall Jerry Manuel. Instead of a warm up jacket and Mets cap, Manuel should wear blue and orange tuxedo with tails, a top hat and sash.

I won’t say J-Man manages scared but this is the problem when you have a lame duck manager, every game is a referendum on his job. Mets beat Highlanders and I expect Ryan Seacrest to pop up on SNY to say the “the votes are in, and Jerry you are safe to advance to the Phillies series” which of course is 100 times more important than the played out Subway Series . Sure it’s good to beat the Taliban of Baseball but the real enemy is making its way up the Jersey Turnpike for three big games.

You have to be encouraged by the pitching match up for the Mets in this up coming series. First, no John Maine or Ollie Perez as R.A. Dickey and Hisinori Takahashi are both upgrades over those two stumble bums, as Dickey will go against Jamie Moyer and Takahashi gets Joe Blanton, then on Wednesday Big Pelf takes on Sissy-Boy Hamels.

There’s no question the Mets need another starter (Mark Buehrle anyone?) but just the fact that Maine and Perez are out of the rotation is a plus as Dickey and Takahashi can not be as bad or worse than the later two.

I hate talking bad about Joe Morgan, as he is one of my favorite players of all time but between him, John Miller and Orel Hershiser they could make you hate watching baseball. Morgan with his “the more runs you score the better your odds of winning the game” analysis reminds me of Chauncey Gardiner. Maybe if John Miller took time away from looking in the mirror while working on his exaggerated pronunciation of Latin surnames (he had to bring up Carlos Beltran just so he could say Bel-TRAN) he’d have gotten the ground rule right on the overly annoying Francisco Cervelli’ 335 ft single, the orange line is just for show John Mi-LLER. The Bulldog doesn’t annoy me but after Morgan and Miller my head just goes numb.

Could the Mets being getting another break with Luis Castillo sore heel? With Ruben Tejada playing well at Buffalo, trip to the DL for Castillo could force a promotion of Tejada to step into the 2nd base position and free up Alex Cora to do his leadership thing.

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J-MAN AND OLD SCHOOL WARTHEN GOING DOWN SWINGING

The big story coming out of last nights Mets game is what is the reaction of the other 24 players to the the handling of John Maine. After getting lifted last night after 5 pitches Maine looked like a guy praying for a life line. When the cavalry came to the rescue in the persons of Jerry Manuel and Old School Warthen, instead of being thankful for saving him, Maine gets all pissy with the manager.

After the game and let me say SNY you suck! Why can’t we see Jerry Manuel’s post game presser live? Why do I have to wait through the insufferable Garry Apple to hear the John Maine pitty party that you promoed as must see, if it’s must see then let me fucking see it! I’ll say this, it was worth my wait but I shouldn’t have to wait and after I see and hear Maine’ melt down,  I want to hear Bobby O break it down not Gary Fucking Apple!

Back to Maine, finally J-Man and Old School are starting to take no prisoners with this team and the pitching staff. If J-Man is going to get the boot he’s not going down without a fight. You, David Wright take the day off. What, you don’t agree with that? Too fucking bad, grab some pine.  John Maine, there is either something wrong with your arm or your head and since you couldn’t break a pane of glass in any of your last starts and your delivery was in slow motion so badly that  Old School Warthen asked you if your ok and  you say yeah even though your mechanics and body language say different. In other words John Maine your are a selfish prick. Your whole post game rant was me-me-me-me and that has been a problem around here for too long. Even the golden boy David Wright acted a like a me-me guy when Manuel told him he needed a day off. I think we can all thank Fredi Gonzalez for mangers finally standing up to players and setting them straight.

I also think that closed door meeting with the Mets brass had something to do with this as well. Maybe J-Man told Jeffey and Omar “look if I’m going down then I’m going down with a fight and I’ll do it by any means necessary”

First Manuel pulled Ollie Perez from the rotation then sat Wright down now he’s called out Maine and how about Old School with his quote on Maine being a “habitual liar” when it comes to his health? The gloves are off Mets fans, if J-Man and Warthen are going down then they going down fighting with bare knuckles. It’s about time.

Manuel and Old School know the next six games will decided their fate. 0-6 and it’s over, 4-2 their safe, 3-3 a toss up, 6-0 then we may look back at that meeting in Atlanta might as the turning point of the season .

Tonight the Mets will honor the 2000 NL Champs.  There will be a pre game ceremony attended by Mike Piazza, Edgardo Alfonzo, Turk Wendell, John Franco and Rick Reed. One other player will make an appearance, Mike Hampton. I’m just hoping the fans attending tonight’s game don’t embarrass themselves and the fan base by booing Hampton. I wasn’t happy when he decided to leave after one year as a Met but he was the MVP of the 2000 NLCS and by leaving the draft pick the Mets received was used to draft David Wright, so just for those two contributions he should get applause.  

How Bobby Valentine is not invited to tonight’s game is a disgrace and shows the short sightedness and pettiness of the Mets ownership. What are they afraid of Mets fans actually cheering at $iti Field?

Castillo to the Rox? Does that mean Daniel Murphy to second base? HELL YEAH!!!!

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ANBODY HERE SEEN MY OLD FRIEND DAVID, CAN YOU TELL ME WHERE HE’S GONE ?

The easy thing to do today is to pile on David Wright for his hat trick strikeout night and his throwing error that cost the Mets the game last night but I’m not hopping on that band wagon. I’m not saying there isn’t anything wrong with Wright, there is as his strikeout rate makes Dave Kingman look like Rod Carew and his defense has been sub-par,  maybe he is still spooked by the beaning he took from Matt Cain last season, maybe HoJo has done more harm than good with his work with Wright. I have no idea what’s keeping Wright from busting out, maybe another season of shouldering the burden of carrying the offense is too much of a beast of burden, maybe there is something physically wrong that he’s not talking about or maybe there is something going on in his personal life that’s eating at him, I’m just a fan like you so I have no answer but the sad part of this is the manager and front office have no clue on what’s wrong with Wright, and that is the biggest part of the problem.

J-Man after the game last night hinted that he felt Wright needs a day or two off and Wright responded with a loud “Hell No” so it’s good to see he still has a flame burning and I agree with Wright for two reasons, one as long as he is healthy physically and mentally then leave him in the lineup, and two, who the hell will fill in a 3rd base? Fernando Tatis? Alex Cora? Please?

Yesterday I started a bit of a shit storm on Twitter taking on our fellow Mets fans of the sabrmetric ilk. My main contention was Jose hasn’t  blossomed into the elite player I thought he would be. Now I know I’m not alone in this thinking as we have seen the brilliance of Reyes game and especially after the 2006 season when at the age of 23 Jose banged out 19 HR and 84 RBI from the lead off spot.  Add in 17 3B 64 SB and amazing range at shortstop why wouldn’t I think that Reyes would become an elite player, a player who would be in the MVP talk for the next 10 years especially as he overcame his hamstring problems and was filling out physicaly.  It hasn’t happen. That’s not to say he’s not a top ML’er as was misconstrued by my Twitter fans, but he has not jumped to that elite level, he’s still young enough and talented  enough to do make it to that level but quite frankly I’m not as optimistic as I was before that he will.

I am listening to Mikhail Porokhorov  on WFAN and if I ever were to meet this man I would throw myself at his feet and plead with him to buy the Mets.

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WHAT, NO DONUTS?

I work in a satellite office of the Agency I work for so when the big brass come for a visit it’s not to see if we have enough Deer Park for our water cooler no, it’s usually for something we fucked up because when you do something right, it never gets acknowledged, but when they do come a callin’ they always bring coffee and donuts. It kind of softens the blow of getting our ass reamed out. Yesterday the Mets Brass led by the biggest Ass decided to go to Atlanta to tear the manger, coaches and players a new asshole but not only did those folks mentioned leave with their rectums intact, the cheap fuck Jeffey didn’t even bring donuts.

Speculation ran rampant through the Land of Blue and Orange that Jerry Manuel, HoJo and Old School Werthen were ready to get pink slipped because why else would the Little Shithead make a trip down South right. Well, not only did no one lose their job, the manager displayed what he thinks of the owner and baseball ops when he came out of his office after the 90 minute meeting and was as asked if he still had a job by replying “I still got my uniform on right” and then gave that laugh that only J-Man can. Right there an owner with balls would have said to take the fucking uni off and go home.

Not only that, Jeffey Skill Sets didn’t even address the team. It seem most players either didn’t know or care that the owner, the GM and Asst’ GM (John Rico) were in the house. It would have made a huge statement if Jeffey called Oliver Perez out in the clubhouse and handed him his unconditional release and then look a GMJ and tell him “Oh and here is one for you too” and then give Jeff Francouer a look and say “you’re lucky that F-Mart kid is made of paper mache or I’d have one for you too” but again that would take a man with balls, with conviction, with leadership three things non-existent in the Mets organization. By the way, good seats still available for this weekends Subway Series at $iti Field

One good thing came out the pow-wow was sending Jenry Mejia down to the minors to stretch out his arm to join the starting rotation sometime this summer. Another experiment gone wrong.

Want a job at WFAN ? Requirments are you must have absolutely no knowledge of sports. Last night on Twitter, Sal Licatta, who’s job it is to fetch Mike Francesa his Diet Cokes, Tweeted that the Mets and Highlanders should make a deal, the Mets send Vitamin Pedro to the Bronx for Ramiro Pena. This caused quite the shitstorm as Mets fans gave Licatta a verbal beat down, and unlike his Pompus Ass Boss, Licatta could not hand wave them away. Stick to being Francesa’ toady Sal.

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ZZZzzzzzz WHAT? THE METS LOST? UHH THANKS! ZZZzzzzzz

With all the talk of canning Jerry Manuel, isn’t that just a smoke screen to cover up the inactivity of the Mets front office? I use the term “front office” instead of just signaling out Omar Minaya who in my opinion has been de-nutted by ownership. If Omar was axed today, it wouldn’t bother me in the least, same with the manager, but until someone on the inside tells us the story of who is actually making the personnel decisions around here, I have to put all the blame on the Skill Sets for the team not making moves to show the players and the fans they want to win.

Mets fans are in a much better position than the players, who have no choice but to show up every day, the fans, they can go spend their time and money someplace else. That’s the beauty of living in NYC, plenty of options here to spend those discretionary funds.

So fine you fire J-Man, who is coming in Bob Melvin? I have no clue what Bob Melvin can do to shake this up. If you make a change why not give Ken Oberkfell the job, and let him bring Ricky Bones with him to be the pitching coach. Obbie has been a loyal Skill Sets solider and Bones has plenty of knowledge of the younger arms in the system  as he like Obbie has been in the org for awhile, so that  would seem to be the move to make.

Look in a perfect world, I’d want the return of Bobby Valentine as my first choice. BV seems to like being on the tele but the allure of running a big league team and his return as a long lost hero would be just the thing to make BV say yes to the job but the Skill Sets are so stupid that they can not comprehend that by offering a sweet deal to Bobby V it would rejuvenate the team and the fan base. If the Mets announced today that BV will be the new manager I’d guarantee they phone and internet lines at the $iti Field ticket office would be overloaded. The only guy right now that can knock LeBron James watch over the back page is Bobby Valentine.

What about Kid Carter? Sure he went about things the wrong way when Willie Randolph was ready for the firing squard but I’m not mad at him. His personality and his stature as a former Met with a World Sereis ring and a plaque in the Hall of Fame gives him instant cred in the clubhouse and with the fan base.

Until the Skill Sets get it through their numb skulls that the fan base is now leaning toward apathy and have voiced their displeasure with the way this team operates by coming down with a chronic case of alligator arms when it comes to buying tickets, they need a big splash to reinvigorate things in Flushing, if not the only lines on 126th and Roosevelt will be for a tire change or a new car radiator.

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SUNDAY FUNDAY

Don’t ask me why but I’ve been thinking of Anthony Young lately

As per Kevin Burkhardt here is the Mets line up for this after noon in SOFL:

Reyes

Cora

Bay

Animal

Wright

Davis

Pagan

Blanco

Niese

Finally J-Man decides to sit Frenchy and replace him with The Animal who not only goes from a Bison, to a pinch hitter but is now the cleanup hitter.

Reyes can not stop showing off his excitement of not having to hit 3rd anymore. Way to know your personnel Jerry

12 pitches, 12 balls last time I saw something like that the players were eating orange slices in the dugout and talking about the latest Sponge Bob Square Pants episode.

Why is it the Tampa Rays who are an MLB welfare recipient can release Pat “He Got No Bat” Burrell and eat his $9mil but the Skill Sets still keep GMJ around ?

Forget Ollie P they will never release him out right. No they idea is put OP in the bullpen so if he just pitches an inning or two he can gut loose with pitches and regain arm strength and hit 90 MPH on the gun. Right, and I can rub Scotts Turf Builder on my head and look like this.

Jenry Mejia tossed 19 pitches yesterday for the Mets. They’ve almost ruined this young man, not quite there yet but give Jerry another week and the job will be complete.

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